This is a difficult subject to write about, mainly because I feel it is in my subconscious. A bit of background to what I call my ‘unconscious worrying’. When a stressful or worrying situation comes up, I don’t physically worry about it in my head, I avoid it. Yet, I get symptoms slowly creeping up, such as nightmares, headaches, finding it harder to do things I can normally cope with. I don’t even realise these symptoms come up, until someone tells me, only then can I realise.

I often get asked by my partner, what is worrying you? then we can talk through it. But I never believe that there is something making me stressed, as I am not thinking about it. We then have to breakdown what is coming up in the future, to see what it is that is subconsciously making me anxious. I can then usually work out how to deal with the situation.

It is odd finally realising a reasoning to why we change behaviour. I find it really beneficial to logically analyse why I may be feeling in a certain way. It is a little hard, as I don’t realise I am subconsciously worrying about something until I start struggling a little. I’m not sure how to change my thoughts when I am not actively thinking these thoughts/hearing them. I have no idea if this makes sense/does anyone else experience something similar?

I usually try to deal with this by trying to work out what the worry may be about, this is the main step! I then see how long away until the potential worry is over(if it is in an event). I then make sure I am not staying awake late ect if I start getting the nightmares(I normally don’t remember, but get told by my partner). I’m a really good sleeper, and feel its important for me to stay on my pattern. If it is a certain situation I am worried about then I plan lots of distractions. If anyone has any suggestions, I would gratefully appreciate.

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